In this episode, Dani Taylor and Ben Mitchell pull back the curtain on the dark side of going viral. Dani shares her personal experience with internet fame and how it changed her view of social media. Together, they explore the emotional toll of navigating a viral moment, the pressures of online presence, and how it affects mental health, authenticity, and community building.
Whether you’re a content creator, fitness enthusiast, or someone trying to find balance in a hyperconnected world, this conversation dives into the real impact of living life online.
📢 Highlights from this episode:
- The unexpected highs and lows of viral internet moments
- Why social media can feel toxic despite its potential
- Tips for building an authentic online community
- Balancing mental health and personal values in a digital world
👉 Tune in for an honest, relatable chat that goes beyond the highlight reels and into the heart of what it means to connect authentically.
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🔎 Related Phrases:
Viral Internet Experience, Social Media and Mental Health, Vegan Podcast 2024, Dani Taylor Podcast, Muscles by Brussels Radio, Balancing Fitness and Online Presence, Authentic Community Building, Mental Health for Creators, Fitness and Social Media Detox
Transcript:
Dani:
Welcome back to Muscles by Brussels Radio. Guys, I wanted to give you a heads up that the first three minutes of this episode, something is wrong with the audio, but it does clear up right after that. So if you want to skip forward to the three minute mark, go ahead and do that. And the audio improves.
Ben:
Hello, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Vegan Proteins and Muscles by Brussels Radio. I’m Ben. And I’m Danny, and this is episode 197.
Dani:
So Ben’s just going to fly up.
Ben:
Here like every other week, record pretty much.
Dani:
That’s.
Ben:
That’s what I have written in my contract, so there’s no getting out of it now.
Dani:
Have you actually, no. You did mention it on the podcast that you moved to Raleigh, because you mentioned it on the one with Alice.
Ben:
Yes, I talked a little bit about that, but it was pretty soon after I moved. I definitely really been there like a month and not even there for a month. Like it’s been a month since I moved approximately.
Dani:
I actually kind of can’t believe it’s already been a month. Yeah, it feels like you just moved, like, to weeks ago.
Ben:
Yeah.
Dani:
I don’t like how quickly this last couple months has gone by, to be honest.
Ben:
My parents were saying it’s kind of weird because I was gone for three weeks and I came back, so it hasn’t fully sunken in that I’m not living with them anymore.
Dani:
You’re only going to be gone for another few weeks and then you’re going to come back.
Ben:
Not even. Not even. I leave Saturday and then I come back a week and a half later on like the 19th. So, yeah, I’m gone for like 12 days or something. Then I come back for another two weeks.
Dani:
You’re just easing your family.
Ben:
Exactly. And myself as well.
Dani:
Yeah. What do you think of it so far? Like, living alone, like everything there is yours. Like you can do whatever you want with it.
Ben:
It’s a little strange. I have been contemplating doing something similar over the past couple of years, but it never felt like the right time or I would get times where I wanted to do that. But ultimately I ended up living at home for a couple years, which is nice because save up money in order to be able to live by myself. And there’s also the aspect of it not being financially the easiest time to get a place by yourself.
It usually is cheaper the more people that you live with. So I was able to get a good deal on the place that I was living. So once I kind of found that place, I was like, okay, right. I’M gonna make that decision so I don’t change my mind or get stuck and decide not to and then end up in the same scenario two or three years later.
So I kind of just pulled the trigger really quickly. So it happened very fast. So I went down there without a car and now I’m driving my car back home because I realized living in North Carolina, there’s not really good public transport, so.
Dani:
Yeah. And I mean, I’ve never been to Raleigh. Is it Raleigh or Raleigh?
Ben:
Raleigh. Raleigh.
Dani:
Depends.
Ben:
Yeah, I don’t know.
Dani:
I mean, I’ve driven through the Carolinas, but I haven’t spent much time there. Is it like a decent sized city.
Ben:
Or it’s a medium sized city? I would say it’s definitely smaller than a Boston or something like that.
Dani:
It’s a medium sized city, smaller than Boston. I would expect a place like that to have some public transportation.
Ben:
Yeah, there are buses and there’s an Amtrak station. But locally getting around, it’s not like here where we have the tea that takes you in and around.
Dani:
Well, Boston, because here we got nothing, Right?
Ben:
When I say here, I mean Boston. Yeah. Not outside of it. I think it’s a little early to say how I like it or how I don’t. And in those first couple of weeks as I was adjusting, there were some difficulties just going from living with people to living by yourself. It’s very quiet. You have to maybe find ways to fill time because you don’t get caught up in little side conversations with people in the house.
And so there’s just more space and more silence, which is a strange thing, which is something that I wanted to experience, to see do I actually like living on own? Because I thought about it before.
Dani:
Yeah.
Ben:
So I felt like now is a good time to do that. And another thing that played into my decision was feeling like I was getting a little comfortable living at home and not being as social as I wanted to be. Going out, meeting new friends, meeting new people. And I knew that by moving to a city where I didn’t know anybody, I would be forced to do that because you don’t know anybody. I mean, some people I guess wouldn’t, but yeah, at least for myself, I know I need some amount of interaction or
I’ll drive myself crazy. Not a ton, but enough to make me go out and do stuff. So I’ve joined some local vegan groups there and some other groups, interests that I have. And so I’ve gone to like some potlucks and gone to an animal sanctuary. My aunt actually is the director of a tiger rescue there.
Dani:
That’s so cool.
Ben:
Which is pretty neat. So she gave me and Rachel, who’s a client of yours, a tour of the place. Rachel lives in Charlotte. So that’s.
Dani:
How far away is that?
Ben:
Two and a half, three hours.
Dani:
So it’s like all the major cities are just a couple hours apart.
Ben:
Yes. So there’s Raleigh, and then Durham and Chapel Hill, which are college towns, more or less are 20, 30 minutes away. And then my aunt lives in Pittsboro, which is like 45, 50 minutes away, so not too far.
Dani:
I loved living alone. Like, I loved it so much. And one time it was very similar to you. I was in Portland, Oregon, and I didn’t know anybody. I lived. Giacomo and I lived together for like a year and a half. And then we decided to live separately for a while. This was a very long time ago, guys. Please don’t worry. And it was awesome. It was so awesome. My apartment was not bigger than this room, and I was, like, in my glories there, but I didn’t know anybody.
And after a couple years living there, I was kind of like, I’m not making any friends, damn it, I’m going home. But it was. I would not take back that experience for anything. It was awesome. I hope you have a really great experience as well. And also, it was your birthday yesterday.
Ben:
It was.
Dani:
Happy birthday.
Ben:
Thank you. I turned 26, so now I’m thinking about the fact that I have four more years until I’m no longer in my 20s. I’m in my 30s, you know, when.
Dani:
I turned 30, 30 actually didn’t bother me at all. Turning 30, I was just like, oh, well, 30, here we go. Something happened when I turned 35, and I was like, I don’t like this anymore. This is halfway to 70. I’m not happy about this. And, yeah, ever since then, I’ve. Getting older has just been like, a little bit stranger. Since then. Since then.
And I have older relatives who have always said to me, like, you know, you get older, but you don’t feel older. Like, you feel the same. And then occasionally you’ll catch yourself in the mirror and be like, oh, shit, who is that? And that hasn’t quite happened. But, yeah, occasionally I’ll think back to, like, my parents when I was a kid and be like, oh, my God, they were younger at that time than I am now.
And I thought they knew everything. And, like, no, they did. Now I know they did not know everything. Yeah, getting older is interesting, but I always remind myself it is A privilege that many people are not granted. So that is my. That’s how I make peace with it all the time. The alternative is much worse.
Ben:
That’s true. And I feel like the better that you take care of yourself as you get older, the less it does feel like that’s actually happening. Like, yeah, I’ve heard so many times, people who maybe didn’t take the best care of themselves for the first 20 or 30 years of their life, they say they feel better at 40 than they did in their late
20s or something like that. So I think that does, to a certain point, demonstrate that you don’t have to necessarily feel your age. Whatever that. Whatever that might mean.
Dani:
Yeah, whatever that means, right. Because, like, you don’t know what it is until you’re there. And then you’re like, wait, is this normal? Is this what other people being alive, man, what a trip. So this is. This is kind of a fun, funny, terrible topic that we have today. We are talking about a post. Well, it started with a absolute nothing burger of a post that I made at the gym after a workout that was showing, like, how muscle, when it’s not flexed, is soft and jiggly, and that’s.
That’s how muscle is. I mean, I could do it. Oops, I bumped the mic. Like, you can do it right now with your calf, right? Just like wobble it around and then you flex it and it’s like a rock. And I did that with my tricep in the video. I didn’t edit it. I didn’t anything. I just. I didn’t even put captions on it. I just threw it up there and it went very, to me, very viral. It’s like, I think just under 7 million views right now.
Ben:
I would say that’s pretty viral. Can I ask what inspired you to make that? Were you just having a thought about it? Did someone ask you a question?
Dani:
So a lot of times when I’m at the gym, I’m thinking about content that I could make. Like, this just pops into my head while I’m at the gym, probably because it’s the. One of the only times I’m not in front of my computer. It’s like the only time my brain has to actually be free is when I’m at the gym. But a lot of times my client conversations that I’ve had throughout that day pop into my head, and it happened to be a conversation I had with a client earlier that day where they were in the video
saying, like, you know, I just want to get rid of this, and they started wobbling their arm around, and I did. I made a video back and did the exact same thing and then flexed it, and they were like, like, mind blown. So I was like, help, help. So, and so maybe it’ll help somebody else.
Ben:
You know, it’s a really famous example of that. I just thought, do you know the Jay Cutler quad stomp?
Dani:
Yes.
Ben:
Where he, like, shakes his quad and then he, like, flexes it and it goes crazy with the striation.
Dani:
That’s. I posted that up in my stories a bunch of times and I mentioned it in comments, which I’ll get to, but it took off, and I’ve never had a post take off like that ever. Maybe once upon a time, Giacomo and I were featured in buzzfeed, and that was a thing, but.
Ben:
Oh, really? I didn’t know that, but it was.
Dani:
Among other vegan athletes as well. That’s the closest I can think of. But this was, like, a fairly vulnerable post. Most of the time when people post online, they’re trying to show their best self. And this was basically being like, look how crazy this looks. But it’s still mostly muscle. And as it was growing, Giacomo was, like, basically updating me every hour on how many views it had now and how many views it had now.
And I was just getting, like, more nauseated every time he told me, why is that? I don’t. I don’t want. I like. I don’t like that much attention. I mean, probably owning a business is not the best move for me for that reason, but I just don’t want that. I don’t like that much attention. And it was not reaching. Well, I didn’t think it was reaching the people that I had intended for it to reach.
Vegan fitness, mostly women who are largely my audience, because it went viral. It was just showing it to everybody. And I really don’t want attention from, like, people that have nothing to do with what it is that we talk about.
Ben:
Young male teenagers who have nothing better to do with their days than to leave hateful comments, perhaps.
Dani:
I mean, I can’t say anything about their age or anything, but it was a lot of men. A lot of men popping on there to say horrible things about how weird and gross I looked, but also that it was a woman thing that was the main thing. Like, no, that’s just women. That only happens to women.
And that’s when I asked both Giacomo and you, hey, can you guys, like, replicate this video to show that it’s not just women, that’s just muscle? Like, Unflexed muscle. And your post actually went, I think it went fairly viral as well.
Ben:
Yeah, it’s got like 500,000 views or something.
Dani:
Yeah, that’s to put it in perspective, I think the most views I ever had on a social media reel or whatever was like 30,000 maybe prior to that. So five, like half a million and seven million is crazy. And I think I posted it and collaborated with you.
Ben:
Yeah, that was my idea for mine. Because I’m like, if you’re getting so much traction right now, it doesn’t make sense for me to post and you to be a collaborator. It makes more sense for you to post and me to be a collaborator.
Dani:
Yeah, but you were getting all the notifications as well.
Ben:
Still am.
Dani:
Yes, yes. They come in every single day. And I don’t remember how our conversation went, but I was like pissed because, you know, you were getting hate on. I mean, don’t get me wrong. And I’ll get to this. The number of positive comments I think far outweighed the negative comments. But there were lots of negative comments on yours too. And I was like ready to friggin fight every single one of them.
Ben:
So is my sister.
Dani:
Yeah. Okay.
Ben:
So I was like, oh, who cares, guys? Whatever.
Dani:
Yeah. And I was, it’s, you know, it’s one thing if it was me, obviously I don’t love it if people are talking shit about me to me, but it’s another thing when it’s like my friend or somebody I work with, somebody I care about, like I’m ready to fight people.
Ben:
Sure.
Dani:
And I just was so impressed that you were like, whatever, like it didn’t get to you at all, right?
Ben:
Yeah, not really.
Dani:
That’s nuts.
Ben:
Yeah. I think many years ago that would not have been the case. And I’ve gotten to a point where I’ve thought about the people that I admire and look up to and you would never catch any of those people leaving hateful comments or mean comments. And so most of the time it’s some sort of insecurity or pain point that you’ve touched in that person that is then causing them to leave a comment on your page. Whether that be because you’re getting a lot of attention and they’re jealous of that,
or you have something that feel they feel like they can poke fun at that will make themselves feel better. And so most of the time, even if what they’re saying is not a nice thing to say, most of the time I’m like, well, this person’s probably in a pretty bad place if the best thing they have to do with their time is to be mean to other people to make themselves feel better. I mean, not everyone is like that. Sure, there are some people who are just bored and think it’s funny, but.
Dani:
Yeah, I just think that’s a really, really mature take. And I also wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that we’re basically like 10, 15 years apart somewhere in there. Like, basically your generation was raised more on social media stuff. Like we. I didn’t have any kind of social media until I had graduated high school. Like, it just didn’t exist. And you probably had it in like middle school.
Ben:
Yeah, right around that time.
Dani:
Yeah. So I don’t know, I wonder if that plays some kind of a role that you guys, you know, I always think, oh, the younger generation, they’re not even going to know how to talk to people in real life because they never had to. But maybe there’s some upsides to just having more, like being able to read an online interaction better. I don’t know.
Ben:
Maybe, maybe. I will say, I think no matter how old you are, it’s not like those comments will never get to you or that there’s not some little bit of you that’s like, fuck that person for saying that. Like, who are you to comment on? Of course, of course it’s natural to have that response. But I try to think about the fact that I don’t want some stranger to have agency or control over how I feel about myself.
And it’s one thing to say it and another thing to feel it. And it’s something, I think that also takes practice. Like, that was definitely not always the case for me where I was like, oh, whatever. I don’t care if someone comments on that. I mean, you think of growing up and going to school and if somebody says a comment like that to your face, that hurts.
And also having social media come in around that age, there were plenty of times where I might have posted something and felt self conscious or insecure. I didn’t even want to start my Instagram when I was in college because I was scared of what people would think. But I think actually exploring fitness grew my confidence a lot. And it’s kind of been a natural progression over the years where I feel more comfortable just, this is who I am, this is what I do.
I’m just going to share that and people are going to feel some kind of way about that. But that’s fine because when I think about all the people who are in my life, maybe I Think about some people more than others. But most of the time you think about somebody for five or 10 seconds of your day, whereas you live in your own head. And so anything that you think about another person thinking about you, you are magnifying that way more.
Like they might have given you two seconds of their thoughts, but you’re perseverating on it and thinking about it way more. So I’ve kind of also just learned that from thinking about how do I view other people. Okay, that’s probably how they view me too.
Dani:
Yeah, no, that’s a very good point. And I, I just, again, I’ve mentioned this in other podcasts. Like, I’m just often very impressed with your, like, level of wisdom. I guess for somebody that just turned 26 yesterday, like, I think that that’s really very impressive. I didn’t want to go on YouTube. Like, I didn’t want to start a YouTube channel at all.
Friends were encouraging me to start. I mean, man, if I had started the YouTube channel like 10 years before, shit, that thing would be so huge. But I was terrified of getting like shredded in the comments because I think it’s probably still true. Like, YouTube comments are generally some of the worst that I’ve seen on the Internet.
Ben:
Depends. But there’s more of an ability to be anonymous, even more so than Instagram or something like that.
Dani:
Yeah. So I didn’t want to do that. Luckily we really, we haven’t dealt with much of that There part of that is like, you know, as your audience grows or as a piece of content gets in front of more eyeballs, you’re more likely to get more of those, like, hate comments. And I am very proud of myself. I did not fight with people. I maybe like one or two in the beginning.
And then when I realized like, no, this is gonna, this is gonna take up a lot of my energy and headspace. I just stopped and I just start. I just started blocking people immediately. What I should have done was screen grabbed the mean comments and then blocked them. But I just blocked them. I blocked people on your post, like, whatever. I. I don’t need those people to see what is going on.
And I’ve never really blocked anybody before. Like, I don’t think I’ve ever maybe had like three people on a block list before that. And now it’s like hundreds, like hundreds of people that are blocked. But it was mostly men. Mostly men with either a profile picture that was like a motorcycle or a cartoon or them holding a fish.
Ben:
Yeah, I was gonna say fish as.
Dani:
Last one and then I’d go to their page and it would always be private and. Or it would have no posts whatsoever, with very rare exception. And like you, it just made me almost feel kind of sad for them because I can’t. I can’t imagine having that kind of time or energy or interest in just kind of tearing somebody else down. But it also made me the whole experience to which I’ll say, I mean, I can’t look at my phone because it’s recording this, but it’s got.
It’s got many thousands of comments at this point. And that’s, you know, with the ones that I deleted and blocked. And many of them were like, you just did for me what therapy couldn’t do for me in five years. Or, wow, you just completely cured my insecurity. Or I showed this to my mom and she literally cried. Like, there were so many really, really touching comments from that as well.
And obviously I’ve chosen to focus on those. And remember, I just made this. Like, I thought the same freaking hundred people that always see my stuff were going to be the only ones that saw it. But even with that, even with all of that, wow, this maybe really helped some people. It still made me just not want to use social media at all. And I guess it gave me some kind of respect for the people that I know that do post a lot, that do deal with, like, nasty comments all the time.
And they keep showing up. Anyway, now there are some creators out there that are like, all engagement is good engagement. That’s not me. Like, I get that the algorithm. All engagement is good engagement. But, like, I don’t. I’m not interested in going and doing something controversial just for the sake of it.
But there are people that just show up. They just keep showing up in spite of that. And I think that it’s. I just think that it’s pretty impressive because I don’t. It really, really turned me off to the whole, like, I don’t ever want to go viral ever again. I don’t think.
Ben:
Yeah, it is. It’s a strategy that people play the whole viral game. And I understand it because if your business largely depends on social media or that is a way that you portray, okay, this is who we are. This is what we’re about. Then there’s a certain need to have more eyes on your content to then, you know, depending what your business is, convert that to leads and whatever
that, wherever that goes. But I think something that I’ve heard is that, yes, it’s about how many eyes, but it’s also about are you finding or attracting the right people?
Dani:
Right.
Ben:
Because there are lots of Instagram accounts that probably have millions of followers and they try to do the, oh, I’m going to do coaching or I’m going to sell a product. And you’d be shocked how little that actually converts into commissions on whatever product they’re selling or coaching. Because people just view them for, hey, I follow this person because they’re funny or because I think they look good, but I don’t actually follow them for their expertise
or the advice that they give out. And so I think it’s often more valuable to focus on providing value and still doing something that is interesting enough to pull people in.
Dani:
Right. But interesting enough to grow, but in a way that is actually reaching the people that you want to reach. It’s. It’s tough. And you’re. You’re so right. There’s so many. I mean, I know people with a million followers that they can’t, they can’t turn that into money at all because it’s just that they are like, drop dead gorgeous and dress it a certain way and post really provocative pictures.
But those people are never going to spend a dime on anything that they’re trying to sell. I’ve always very much been of the mindset that, like, a small but engaged audience of people that are actually interested in what you have to say is just better anyway. Like, you’re able to have more targeted, nuanced conversations that you can’t have when you’re just speaking to everybody all of the time.
But still, I think, even still, I think many of us, you know, I’d be lying if I said, like, oh, when we post a video, I hope no one sees it. Like, you know, I want lots of people to see it. I want lots of new people to see it. So I think a lot of people are shooting for that virality. Even people that don’t have businesses, they just like, dream about what it would be like to post something that absolutely blew up.
Because for some people, I guess that really does change their life from that point forward. But I. That’s. It was not the experience. Not that I ever, like, fantasized about that specifically, but that was not the experience that I expected it to be. It was much. That was much rougher than I expected it to be. I even had Giacomo after, like the second day or something.
I was like, giacomo, you are in charge of the comments. I don’t even want to read these anymore. And he did do that for a couple of weeks. He just went in and he blocked the people instead. So, yeah, uh, yeah, I guess. I guess. I mean, we see that in lots of different mediums. Like, it’s, you know, success is not all it’s cracked up to be. But I absolutely see how in the gladiator days, people sat around and watched people beat the living shit out of each other to the death.
Because that is. I mean, that’s kind of what it looks like to me on social media, is like, people just, like, eating each other and everybody, like, cheering it on. Yeah, it’s so. What a weird phenomenon to exist. And I remember being like, I can’t believe people sat around and watched people kill each other. And now I’m like, I absolutely believe people sat around and watched people kill each other.
Ben:
So I think part of the reason people find it entertaining is because things that people say in the comment section are things that these days, people just wouldn’t say out louder. In real life, people have more filters and more boundaries and what is societally acceptable. Whereas back in those times, it was probably like, yeah, whatever, like, if we have a problem, we’re gonna fight it out.
Whereas, like, you can’t really do that in modern. Modern day. And one thing I did want to touch on with what you’re talking about is I think it’s easy to see how people who do have a large following or presence, but don’t necessarily have that connection with their audience would experience that burnout. Because if you don’t feel like you.
The content that you’re making is meaningful and it impacts people. You can get all the likes in the world and have people who look at you or up to you, but if. If you get caught in that trap of just making content for other people and not making content that you want to make, and there’s no kind of connection or community there, I could see it feeling very, like, isolating, like you’re only making content for, you know, for what at that point, like, just attention.
It becomes very empty very quickly. And I think what you were saying is, like, okay, even though there was a lot of negative that I didn’t like from this, there were all these comments of people saying how much it benefited them and how much it had an impact on them. And I think that’s what can continue to make sure that you have longevity in staying on social media and continuing to put
yourself out there. If you feel like, even if I don’t really want to make this content or film this video or shoot this real, it may help somebody, and that could be worth it.
Dani:
Yeah, absolutely. And, you know, most of those, the vast majority, probably 99 plus percent of the women that did leave comments like that, that wasn’t the audience I was trying to reach. They’re not vegan. A lot of them aren’t even into fitness at all. They were just. Just women that happened to see it and resonate with the message. So I’m, I am really glad I made it.
It was something I wanted to make. It wasn’t vegan specific. It wasn’t even really fitness specific necessarily. It was more just like the body image bullshit that everybody deals with, you know. But I could not help but think, you know, I am in pretty good shape. I have a decent amount of muscle. I’m relatively lean, not shredded. Don’t everybody, you know, got plenty of comments pointing that out, but I think I’m in pretty good shape.
And the comments about my appearance were so brutal. Not all of them, but enough of them. I was like, how are other people supposed to post? How are people that maybe are not in good shape or working on their fitness journey or not? Like, we’re not working on their fitness journey. Like, how are they supposed to feel comfortable posting anything if, like, you were like, what, 5, 7% body fat maybe, but pretty lean?
You were very, very lean and people were picking at you, saying that you, like, weren’t in shape or something. And it’s like, what. How is anybody supposed to post anything on the Internet? And you got like opposing types of comments as well. Like, you were so lean, you looked sick, but also you were super tiny and not even a bodybuilder. Like, okay, what? And then.
Ben:
And I post it, you know, I’ve made posts in other places and they’ll be like, oh, you’re not natural. You’re clearly on steroids. Like, you know, because I have. Maybe I’m, you know, I shave my head. Oh, look, you’re losing your hair. Clear side effect of steroids and stuff like that.
Dani:
But also comments that say, like, you’re tiny and you don’t even lift. Like, those are opposite things. And I got a ton of that too. Like, no, girl, you’re just fat. Whatever you need to tell yourself. Basically. I got lots of those comments. I also got lots of like, you look like a man comments. And I was like, okay, which one is it?
Like, I’m just soft and flabby or I’m so muscular I look like a man. Which one of these things is it supposed to be? Or like, you know, no, there’s still fat There. And it was like, of course, like of course. Which is actually why yours was so great. Because basically there wasn’t.
Ben:
Yeah, there wasn’t a lot. Yeah.
Dani:
And it was still true. But this weird thing of saying like, no, this, there is muscle here equating to people. I’m saying that I am 100% muscle was just like such a weird interpretation. And I guess, I guess that’s to be expected when your stuff is in front of like 7 million eyeballs that you will get very strange interpretations. And you see it on other people’s posts as well, right? These weird comments that are all over the map.
So you like can recognize that that happens to people, but then when it happens to you, you’re just like, ah, I don’t even know what to think. And then I also was completely blocked after like I mentally, I was blocked. Everybody was like, you gotta capitalize on this. You gotta post more stuff like this. Like whatever the algorithm is liking right now. You just post more of that. And I was just like a deer in headlights.
Ben:
I was like, but that’s, but that’s exactly. I feel like the trap that people get into is they make one kind, they try lots of different kinds of content, then they post one thing that happens to take off and then they try to do everything after that is all like that. And usually it’s either you get burnt out because you don’t like making that content or it’s just not.
Dani:
It’s.
Ben:
You’re never going to replicate what it was with that thing. And you never know. It could have just been timing that that happened to catch the algorithm. You might make 10 videos similar to that and none of them, they’re just normal posts for you. So I think weaving in those aspects of things you think could catch on and have people click on. Sure. But you can’t, you can’t make everything based off how one post performs. You can’t make that your whole.
Dani:
A lot of people do. A lot of people do exactly that. And sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t work. So. But I couldn’t, I could not do it. And then I couldn’t, I couldn’t think of anything to post after that. It’s like, I like you hear about bands or musicians, they have like, they’ve been struggling, struggling, struggling, and then they have a hit record and then everyone’s waiting for the follow up record and they just have like the worst writer’s blog because they’re like,
how am I going to follow that up? That’s basically how I was like, how am I going to. I don’t have anything. I ended up posting something incredibly mediocre after that to just, like, break the pressure of, like, cool. Now back to my normal mediocre views. But it’ll never not crack me up how little effort was put into that reel versus how much effort goes into some of the other ones that never see the light.
Ben:
That’s always how it is, especially if you’re trying to provide some sort of education. It’s usually not the educational post that catch people’s attention because it’s not flashy and it’s not super interesting. People don’t want to read it.
Dani:
I mean, I didn’t have a microphone for that. I didn’t have, like a stitch of makeup on. Like, nothing, which I would have normally. It’s just really very funny and ironic. Like, of course. Of course I make content for 15 years and me flapping my arm around is the thing that goes viral.
Ben:
Yeah, love that. One thing that I thought of as well. When you’re talking about, oh, if I made this post and I look relatively fit and in shape, how are somebody who doesn’t feel that way going to make a post? At the same time, you can also view it at the opposite end of the spectrum. Like the male men’s physique Mr. Olympia winner. His name’s Ryan Terry.
He basically was found out that he was photoshopping his photo. So it’s like even the best Ben’s physique athlete in the entire world is photoshopping their photos. And the only reason you could think that they would be doing that is, okay, there’s probably some insecurity there. Why is there insecurity there?
It’s probably because they’ve gotten some sort of external signal that you are not meeting a certain criteria or threshold and you need to be better. And it’s like no matter where you are on that spectrum, you’re going to probably get people who tell you whatever it is, there’s gonna be something negative.
Dani:
Yeah. Depending on how you look at it, probably can be very freeing. Like, if so and so is getting shitty comments, then I don’t need to worry about it because, like, we have another friend and I’m not gonna mention who it is because I don’t want people to go search for this. But a friend who’s also on YouTube and has a great, informative, fun channel about health and fitness who is super, super kind all the time and not fake at all, and somebody made a video about them that was just Just
shredding them. Like, this wasn’t a bunch of comments. This was just a full, I don’t know, 25 minute video. Like it was a long video, just shredding them to pieces. And they text me and we’re like, it happened. This is the worst thing ever. And it happened and it just, it made. This was a couple months after this happened to me. And it just made me so sad, like, that there are people out there that will build their career.
Like this isn’t just random people posting a shitty comment. That’s going to happen no matter what. There’s people out there building a career on ripping other people down. And they are super rewarded for doing so by the algorithms, by people like the drama.
Ben:
People like to see people torn down because it reminds them that. I should rephrase that. When you have somebody that you maybe wish you were more like them and then somebody knocks them down a peg or closer to your level, you’re like, yes, they’re not all. They’re all cracked up to be. I think it’s a very human thing to do, is to feel like our ego is wounded or hurt because we have somebody that deep down we wish that maybe we had something that they had.
And so when they, when we perceive them to have lowered their status, then that makes us feel better about our situation. So I think that’s why that kind of content catches on people like a villain to a certain extent.
Dani:
Yeah. And I mean, I watch lots of commentary, commentary slash critiques of different fitness professionals. I know you and I watch similar videos in this regard. Sometimes they’re pretty scathing, but at least it usually feels like these are people that are on the same playing field. You know, it’s. Nobody’s punching down, you know what I mean? But there are lots of channels out there that are just punching down on people.
I actually think the critique videos of people largely on the same playing field, I actually find those to be really helpful and interesting. I mean, we’re talking about a very niche type of video here, but I enjoy those. And I also feel like it’s almost a game that they’re all in on.
Ben:
Yeah, it’s a debate that they’re having that they all kind of know is going to be beneficial. Even if they’re not directly conversing behind the scenes, they’re engaging in this mutual agreement where I’m gonna make a drama video about you or I’m gonna disagree with the video that you put out and we’re gonna have this back and forth and people are gonna get sucked into this debate or this conversation, and we’re both gonna get viewers and
followers from it because there are inevitably gonna be people who haven’t seen our channels before who come across it. And I agree with this person, or I agree with this person.
Dani:
It’s like, it’s like, it’s like the anti. Collaboration. Collaboration basically. But to just make a video about somebody that like you don’t know at all. I don’t know. Again, I just. Some of this stuff I’m just not cut out for. I understand it’s like baked into a lot of business models that you do these things. And obviously I’m not cut out for it, but it’s just.
It’s just an interesting thing to think about. And I guess the whole reason I wanted to make this podcast was so that the viewers could. Could think about this stuff the next time they’re scrolling around on social media and they will see videos of, of people doing really cool stuff or really helpful stuff, or being torn down in the comments, or getting hate for weird reasons that don’t actually make any sense or, you know, worst case scenario, like, don’t be that person.
Just don’t be that person. I would like to think most of the people listening to this podcast are not that person. But you know, there are people that I vehemently disagree with on social media, like the Carnivore diet people. I don’t even know where to begin with how much I disagree with them, but I even them. I’m not gonna go start an argument in their comments, like, what good comes of that? I mean, do you ever do anything? Do you ever engage with that sort of stuff?
Ben:
No, I just feel like it’s most of the time a pointless conversation. I’d rather reach people who I actually feel like have the potential to be reached, Whereas those people are so far gone that there’s not going to be any productive conversation to be had.
Dani:
Corinne does it. Corinne reacts to all of the people that he disagrees with. And I give him a lot of credit because I don’t. I could not do that. It’s like, it’s like. It’s like almost starting a fight with a new person every day just doesn’t.
Ben:
Feel good to me. I don’t think I could do it for a sustained period of time. Like, it feels icky to make that kind of content. Or even if it’s. I think we’ve all had this feeling. Even if you get into a debate with somebody, I think this is actually really seen in Relationships. You have a debate with your partner and let’s say you win the debate. Nobody wins.
Dani:
Yeah, nobody wins.
Ben:
It’s like, even if you have a conversation with somebody and you feel like you won, you don’t really feel like that afterwards. You feel like, man, I just like, had a, like, yeah, I guess I’m right. And you get that little ego boost for a little bit, but then you’re like, it just doesn’t feel as good as like having a conversation with somebody who maybe they’re like, oh, I didn’t think of
that before. Now you’ve changed my perspective. Let me think about that. That feels very uplifting coming away from that conversation. So I think that is how I prefer to.
Dani:
But that is so rare and very hard to do. And I feel like it’s not happening in the comment section.
Ben:
Yeah, true.
Dani:
I mean, maybe. Tell me if I’m wrong. Maybe you’ve seen a comment somewhere that changed your perspective on something. But I don’t think, I don’t think I ever have.
Ben:
I’ve maybe had some DMs of people where. Or I get a comment and then I’ll DM them or something and then say like, oh, well, why do you think that? And go down that road. But it’s pretty rare that something like that will happen. Yeah.
Dani:
Yeah. I don’t know. Anyway, hopefully this wasn’t too rambly for you guys. I’m very curious to hear your thoughts on this. Have any of you guys ever experienced something like that? Do you watch those types of takedown channels? Is that what that would be called?
Ben:
Like, so reaction. Reaction channel, something like that? Drama. Drama channels. Yeah, that’s what I think of. I think it’s also just a good message to say that just because somebody has a lot of followers and they get a lot of attention, they’re people too, and they take that, that stuff to heart. And you don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes. Just because somebody maybe looks super confident on social media and they have a lot of.
They get a lot of attention, it doesn’t mean that they don’t also read all the negative comments. And maybe those are the ones, the only ones that they really care about. And so, yeah, I mean, you hear this all the time with people who are famous or celebrities. They’re not necessarily happier than the average person.
Dani:
So, yeah, there’s. The human brain is wired to focus more on the negative. Like that’s what we’re wired to do. Because that historically could keep us alive. Right. If you are more focused on the potential threats coming at you, then hopefully you can avoid them and stay alive. That was great when we were cavemen, but sometimes it’s not helpful now.
But our brains are still hardwired to do that. So if you can push that stuff out, because I don’t think most of it is helpful. A valid critique is a valid critique, but just insulting one another, I don’t think that’s helpful. I don’t think it’s great to even engage with that stuff on other people’s content. Like fighting with other people. Like, basically what I wanted to do on yours was fight with people to defend you.
Like I wanted to do it. I mostly did not do that because I don’t. Like you said, I just don’t think it’s a good use of time anyway. All right, guys, let us know what you think about this. If you are interested, be sure to follow us on social. Follow us on social media, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube. If you’re not following Ben already, it’s at Ben Mitchell coaching. I would never get this.
Ben:
Ben A. Mitchell. Just kidding. That’s one of my emails.
Dani:
Oh, all right.
Ben:
That’s forgivable.
Dani:
It’s at Ben A. Mitchell. What’s your, what’s the A stand for?
Ben:
That’s my middle name. Alexander.
Dani:
Alexander.
Ben:
Yes.
Dani:
Oh, that’s.
Ben:
That would be a long, A long tag to have there.
Dani:
And if you don’t watch Ben’s YouTube channel. So it’s not the Vegan Proteins YouTube channel, it’s a separate channel which is called Ben A. Mitchell. Right?
Ben:
Yes.
Dani:
Okay. That one I remember seeing clearly. It’s a great, great channel. There’s some recent videos up there that I think are fantastic and worth. Anybody that’s interested in the type of content we put out would also be, I think, very interested in that. So check that out. If you’re interested in any kind of one on one coaching.
Ben’s got some spots open right now. So go to veganproteins.com fill out a coaching application or just shoot us an email. Coach vegan proteins.com Once again, my name is Danny. I’m Ben and we will talk to you soon. Bye.
