What the heck happened to social media!? Is any of this real anymore? Even when the fake-ness is obvious (and it’s not always obvious these days), it still takes a toll on us emotionally and socially. Today we welcome back Athena Trombly for some real talk!
As promised, here is our list of badass women over 45 that are worth following on Instagram:
@women.60.plus
@aliciasilverstone
@susanniebergallfitness
@welcometoheidi
@drjengunter
@iconaccidental
@korea_grandma
@joanijohnson
@bagandaberet
@drewbarrymore
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TRANSCRIPT:
Dani
Hello, everybody. Welcome back to another episode of Vegan Proteins, Muscles by Brussels Radio. My name is and I’m Athena and this is episode 175. All right, everybody. Welcome back. We have the Lovely Athena with us today. I don’t actually remember the last podcast you and I did together, but I always enjoy them, man.
I like, I remember where I was, but I don’t remember what we were talking about, but you have some interesting stuff going on. I know I told everybody that I got LASIK like, I don’t know, two months ago or something and you just got it this week. How was your experience?
Athena
Yeah. It’s got a lot done recently. I’m making all the changes. I got LASIK last Wednesday. So it is host one week and the experience itself. I don’t know what you’ve said about it already, but it is so easy. Like it’s literally takes like 10 minutes. I was, I was nervous, but honestly now that I’ve done it, I’m like, I could like, easily.
I hope I don’t have to do that again, but I could easily do it again. It’s, it’s literally so quick and you’re not, you don’t actually see anything like poking you or anything. So, but I’m feeling ok, I can see up close very well, far away is still a struggle, but they say that can take time. So we’ll see what happens.
Dani
Yeah. And mine was the exact opposite. Right. Like far away. I could see almost instantly and close up. I was like, wait, what, what is this? I don’t like this, which has improved, by the way, it’s still, it’s still probably not gonna go back 100% but it’s, it’s better like it’s still an improvement from where it was before.
Athena, Dani
And if I wanted to go back for a touch up, I could, but I don’t think I’m going to, yeah, they said it can take weeks to months for it to completely.
Athena
it can just continue to improve. So hopefully.
Dani
Isn’t that funny how they tell you that after?
Athena
Yeah, it’s a little interesting. I feel like they advertise it like you can see right away really well. And I’m like, ok, well, I see worse at this very moment. So please tell me my vision will come back. But he did say it could be because of the protozoal or whatever I’m dropping in my eye that can make it blurry.
Athena, Dani
My eyes are also dry so I need to keep up with the eye drops, but crossing my fingers, my vision comes back better I mean, Jack and was like, oh, this is like, they can’t screw it up.
Dani
They do it all the time. And I was like, I have read some stories of them screwing it up. I was super nervous but not for the procedure itself, even though I was a little nervous for that because it is kind of freaky. Right. Like, they hold your eyes open all clockwork orange style.
And I, I didn’t love that part but it was so fast that, yeah, I couldn’t complain about it. The actual procedure at all. And afterwards they, when they took me out of the room, they put me in a massage chair for 30 minutes. It was freaking awesome.
Athena
That’s nice. They can’t do that for me. They said, ok, cool out. Now, I was like, ok, II, I was like, like, can I open my eyes because I didn’t know what to do? They weren’t expressing anything and she’s like, well, of course, how are you going to get out of here? I was like, oh, ok. Walk out then. Bye.
Dani
Yeah. I think the, the doctors and I’ve experienced this with plastic surgeons in the past. Like, they know stuff you don’t know. But they think, you know, like, they, they’re talking to you like, you know, and you don’t actually know. It’s, I feel like they should do a better job with that.
Athena
I concur because I also had to get my eyes dilated beforehand and I didn’t know that was gonna make my vision completely for hours. So I told my boss I was gonna leave for, like, an hour and then I was like, oh, my gosh, I can’t read. I’m not gonna be back for half the day.
Dani
Yeah, that’s, I mean, I’m kind of surprised that you’ve never had your eyes dilated before, especially since they found your brain tumor through your eyes.
Athena
I, I think, I mean, I have, but I think it’s probably like, one of the last times have that done? That was a long time ago.
Dani
You might, you might not notice if you’re not driving.
Athena
Yeah. But, yeah, it’s pretty bad. So, yeah, they don’t explain very well, but I am happy because I also got my eyebrows micro bladed before I had my LASIK and that’s very nice because I haven’t had, you’re not allowed to wear makeup. So, I was like, ok, well, at least my eyebrows will be done.
Dani
Yeah. I, I didn’t mind it too much because I don’t really wear eye makeup anyway, unless it’s like a fancy occasion except concealer. I didn’t wear concealer for like, a whole week.
Athena, Dani
So I like scar.
Dani
Yeah, I’ve been, I’ve been trying to wear, like, less and less and less makeup over the years. Like, I go back and watch some of our youtube videos from 2018 and I’m like, ah, that’s like a full face, full face of makeup right there. but I think seeing yourself with makeup, like full face of makeup all the time makes your regular face look weird to you.
So that’s part of the reason. Yeah, so that’s kind of a little bit what we’re talking about today. So, I mean, the title of the episode is basically gonna be something like social media bullshit and everything you see is fake. But I don’t think we just have to talk about social media but I think it’s a good place to start. Because you and I have had a conversation very similar to this before, but it’s probably like over a year ago and even though that doesn’t sound like a long time, I feel
like the internet has changed like significantly even since then a shout. A I Yeah. A I is insane. I mean, I guess it existed last time we were talking about it but now it’s like accessible to the average person. You can like pay to go build a person like, like the actual image of a person, make them talk and do things and there’s a I influencers that aren’t even real people. Have you seen that?
Athena
I did see the A I beauty pageant thing where they’re like having the best A I profiles, like they’ll win whatever for the most followers engagement, all the things, but they’re all fake. They’re not even real people just I haven’t seen that. I Yeah, it’s like a thing. It’s a beauty pageant.
Athena, Dani
That’s for a I specifically but who is entering it?
Athena
Like, like web engineers, that will have to be researched but probably people that are just really good at creating the, like, perfect face apparently, quote unquote. Perfect.
Dani
Yeah, that’s so wild. I’m not like anti A I or anything like that. I mean, I’ve used it, I ask it questions. It’s my Portuguese speaking buddy. so it helps me with learning Portuguese on a regular basis. But some of the stuff that it can do is crazy. Like I, I got hit with a video that was like this A I woman is making $70,000 a day and this, this A I influencer is making $70,000 a day and it’s some company created an influencer and they, I mean, she’s, she’s gorgeous, of course.
And she, she talks, she has a personality, she, they can put her in any advertisement that they want, she can say or do anything and they don’t have to pay an actual like person do stuff anymore. But I mean, the, the human being influencers were already like kind of like scary and fucking up the world enough.
Athena
Yeah, that’s scary. It’s all scary because we human beings are editing, editing themselves to look like a I, I guess and now a I just trying to look like humans. It’s social media is a scary place right now.
Dani
It is, it’s in another one. That I’ve seen. This is kind of cool but kind of creepy. At the same time, you
can basically, I could make a video talking about, you know, the best vegan proteins to eat are this that or the other. And if you want to lose weight, you can do this and then I can run it through a program and it will make me speak French.
Say the whole thing in French. It’s my voice, my mouth is still moving. Like I’m speaking French. You would just think it’s me just speaking French. But that’s not really cool.
Athena
That’s amazing.
Dani
It’s, it’s cool but also like a little bit scary that it can like basically deep fake you so quickly.
Athena
Yes, deep fake is terrifying. That is so scary. The thing. Yeah. Honestly A I internet and social media. It’s all pretty creepy right now. There’s, there’s a lot of, fakeness and unknowns.
Athena, Dani
Like one of them, a lot of unknowns.
Dani
Like if it can make me look like I’m speaking fluent French in 30 seconds. It could make me look like I’m beating a puppy outside in my yard or doing something horrible or something incredibly inappropriate.
Athena
Like, yeah, I’ve heard they are doing that. Like there’s also, yeah, they’re also doing that with, adult content. Yes, adult content. They are using A I for that as well and they’re deep faking like celebrities for adult content. It’s just, pretty disgusting. Yeah, I, I don’t know if you knew this fun fact. Everyone there is a huge environmental impact on you, like, with using a I, which I had no idea. Like it uses a lot of water for the cooling process and I had no idea.
Dani
Interesting. So it’s kind of like, like crypto because I didn’t know when somebody was explaining crypto. Don’t even get me started on crypto. If Jone knows I’m even talking about Crypto on this podcast. He’s gonna be so pissed because he’s like all for it and I’m very against it. But crypto uses a ton of energy like a ton of energy to add on to the Blockchain or whatever the hell.
Athena, Dani
So it’s terrible for the environment, some things.
Athena
But today we’re talking about mental health.
Dani
Yeah. And like body image and how, how this is probably going to change the way people think about themselves. Not A I specifically just the internet in general. And how so much about the internet is just fake, like it’s just fake, but our brains, even though like all the logical part of your brain, you can, can know like the logical part of your brain can be like everything I see on the internet is
fake. The huge emotional part of your brain like cannot differentiate between what it’s seeing and the fact that it’s not real and it really affects our self esteem a lot.
Athena
They there’s like they made it so easy. So easy. I, I’ve looked at I forgot what the app is called, but I used an app and it has a I on it for editing photos and I edited my clothes because you can make it a completely different color, but you can also make it a completely different outfit. So I edited my clothes to be a different color because I wanted to and I’m just like, let’s see how this is and then it like, it looks so real, but you can edit your
full outfit. Like you could like, I could have changed myself to be wearing a skirt, a dress, a shirt, like completely different. And I was like, what? Like this is insane.
Dani
Yes, Giacomo. And I, one night I got hit with like a, an ad to download an app. That was something like that.
Athena, Dani
It was like to me, oh, I found it, I found it to make like headshots, of your so like professional headsets.
Dani
Yeah. And, we were just playing with it, you know, obviously we didn’t post any of these. So if you’re watching the youtube version of this, like us Jacko, but it’s not Jacomo. That’s a, I some of them were bad. That’s a, I like there were ones of me as well. It’s a, that’s insane. Yeah, it’s, it’s pretty insane. And we, like I said, we didn’t post them anywhere.
We were just sitting around like laughing at them basically. But, it is so creepy that any, I mean, I could download that app and take your picture without you even knowing I could just screenshot an image of you, and just put it in there and make fake pictures of you everywhere. So bizarre. Oh, here we go. Ready. Here’s, here’s one of me.
Athena
Oh, my God, you guys have to look at. If you’re not watching, please watch these.
Dani
Sorry for all the audio people. I won’t show any more. Oh, I will show one more because I was like, yeah, that just looks like a regular picture of me but it’s not me.
Athena
It’s just literally photos of their head but like other bodies, another body that aren’t theirs, but it looks very realistic, which is insane.
Dani
And those ones were kind of like the head shot versions. There were body versions like, you know, women in bikinis or whatever. I could have photoshopped my face onto. I didn’t because I, I didn’t think my brain needed that but it’s just, it’s, it’s pretty wild. And I definitely do think that there are people, probably people that we follow that are using things like that to their advantage, I guess from like an influencer perspective or even just, you know, for their own ego to
post something and feel really good about it. And you know, kind of not talk about the fact that it’s not real and then other people are like Oh, so, and so would never post a fake photo of themselves. But, like, it is a fake photo. So, like, how do you, how could one tell? That’s the thing is like, there used to be, like, these tells, I think your stuff was edited. I mean, I guess some professionals can tell.
Athena
I really don’t think most people can tell anymore. I think it’s so good because I’ve even seen, let me see. what’s the app that I, I have downloaded? Because I just think it’s in, oh, it’s facetune. That’s actually popular. Yeah, that’s the one I have and you can literally edit everything on you on you completely. I’m not recommending this to people.
but it’s pretty insane. Like you can edit your body parts and like even if you zoom in like it doesn’t affect the lines and stuff like I’ve tested it and I’m like, this is crazy. I’ve tested it like on almost everything. I’m just like, let’s just change everything and see like what I can do.
Dani
I actually did that in a video. I think it was in a youtube video. I was talking about probably a similar topic to this and I just posted like a face tune screen recording of like while I’m talking. It’s me changing myself to somebody else completely, but it’s like a $5 app or something like that recently.
Athena
But I think it’s got even more advanced. Like it’s just like it’s continuing to advance and now you don’t even really have to like, do it yourself. You can just like click like I want this part whatever like crazy.
Dani
And I’ve heard people are taking these photos, like taking a photo of themselves, editing it to what they would, what they wish they looked like, taking it to a plastic surgeon and being like, can, can you do this? Can you make me look like this?
Athena
No, I’ve heard that with Snapchat feed or Snapchat like whatever the feature filters, filters. I’ve heard people want to look like their Snapchat filters and I’m like, oh so insane. And you know, plastic surgeons are making a lot of money right now trying to reach this unattainable, unachievable look, including me. I think I’m always looking at other people and it’s hard not to but man, like people are doing like everything. I’ve seen plastic surgeons doing full body like
transformations on people, full body, complete reconstruction. It’s like people are paying a lot of money nowadays. And the scary thing is that nobody knows like it’s not anymore. I think it used to be super obvious when people did anything but people are getting stuff done all the time and we don’t even know. So on top of the filters, people are also getting a lot of cosmetic procedures. Botox very are very common. You don’t know that.
Dani
And I’m not anti plastic surgery, you’re not anti plastic surgery. But I think we’re just so much more vulnerable to feeling like we need something done that if we hadn’t seen XYZ, whatever person over and over and over again, we might never have even thought we needed something like that done. I remember when I got my, my plastic surgery which was to get the loose skin at the, you know, the bottom of my stomach removed from the £100 of weight loss.
Like that’s what I wanted done. I also wanted it done to my chest. So basically it was like a breast lift because they’re just getting rid of the skin and then stitching the rest up all the loose skin. But I remember like they low key almost tried to bully me into getting breast implants. Like they could not believe I would want to get this done and not get breast implants.
They literally were like, you’re gonna look like a little boy and I was like, for a second, I was like, am I making some horrible mistake right now? But I ended up going with my gut, didn’t get the implants very happy. But yeah, they, they, it’s almost like a, like they’re trying to turn everybody into the same person.
Athena
Yeah. Well, they are because they know what the majority of society wants at that time. I know my, I, I had plastic surgery under my chin. I had chin liposuction and they were trying to sell me on a bunch of other things too. She was like, well, you’re definitely also probably gonna want a chin implant, which was, by the way, an
extra $2000. But if I don’t get a chin implant, then I should definitely get filler under my chin. And I’m like, oh, you’re making insecurities that weren’t there before.
Athena, Dani
Exactly, making insecurities that weren’t my chin ever in my life.
Athena
Like not my chin chin. So like I had chin liposuction, which is just under the chin fat removal. But she made me like, start thinking on my actual chin and like extending it out. And I’m like, oh my goodness, I would have never thought about that in a million years if you didn’t bring it up.
Dani
Right. Yeah, it’s great. And I feel like social media does exactly that to people without, you know, without being so obvious without being like, hey, this is wrong with you. It’s just highlighting other things that are so different than the, than the way you are over and over and over again that you start
to think like, is it me? Am I the one, am I the thing that’s like different or off or wrong?
Athena
And it’s, am I the only one that has pores? Like, I don’t know that I’ve ever seen someone with pores before.
Dani
It, it’s pretty wild. Oh, my cat is coming to say hello. So he’s probably going to walk through a few times. We love a cat and then like when it comes to fitness, I think that obviously a I is gonna be insane there because you’re gonna be able to create a body, any kind of body that you want. But you know, even real people are just editing their bodies like into oblivion, basically making their waists so small and their butts so big.
Which I was joking actually with Sawyer recently. he said something about his girlfriend having like a fat butt in front of her mom and, and she thought he was insulting her because 30 years ago, that would have been like the worst thing you could say to a woman was like, you know that it was like, oh does this make my butt look big? The answer was no, always no.
And now if you told somebody no, that would be like the insult. Yeah. So I thought that was kind of funny. So yeah, I just bodies being edited. But even even if somebody is not editing their stuff, right? Even if someone is like literally just posting their best selves, like we all do in good lighting in flattering poses, the way social media is designed is that the 1% is what’s gonna be pushed out to everybody.
So, you know, the most conventionally beautiful people, men and women, that’s what the algorithm is gonna show to everybody. And then your whole feed ends up being full of people who look like that and you start to think looking like that is normal when like think about going, going to the grocery store like that is not normal. Most people don’t look like that. Yeah, I just think we forget it.
Athena
That’s one of my favorite examples. Honestly, it’s just like go outside. I’m trying to look at people because they don’t look like they do on Instagram and like I look completely different right now than I probably will on Instagram because I would do my makeup. I would do my hair. I’m gonna put a nice outfit on. I’m gonna go outside with the best lighting, like you said, like there’s ways to curate yourself to look quote unquote better without like faking it, you know, and, and even
if people do look like that on Instagram, that’s not how they look all the time. Like I definitely don’t look as great as I do on Instagram all the time because I just don’t care to put the work in. I don’t want to do my makeup and stuff at home.
Dani
Oh Yeah, when I’m gonna film like, if I’m gonna feel like actually I didn’t do anything for this day. Thank God, I just happened to have makeup on today because most days I don’t actually have any on because I almost forgot about this podcast and I had to jump on at the very last second.
But on days that I’m gonna film for like youtube, those are specific days I am specifically dressed for those days. except the video podcast. I told everybody you get what you get for the video podcast and I am held true rocking just a sweatsuit.
Athena, Dani
Basically everyone come for this.
Dani
Yeah. So, so what do you do about this? Like, because like we just said, even if logically, you know, like, you know, that most of what you’re looking at is not real. How, how do you actually get the other part of your brain? That more emotional, reactive side of your brain to get it? Any ideas? Cry.
Athena
Just kidding. Just kidding. Well, one just focus more on the good things. Focus on yourself and remember that everyone else is just focusing on themselves. I love seeing like the videos of people doing like the most ridiculous things in front of people and people just don’t care like they just walk by like that’s gonna be a second memory in their life whereas we hold on to things for so long.
just just letting it let it go. focus on yourself. Focus on good things, focus on, focus on things that make you feel good and a little, a little less time on Instagram, maybe maybe donate to someone in need or go to a animal shelter, donate your time.
Dani
I was gonna say just get offline like get offline for a while. It is, it is a ta I mean, I have to be on there because of what I do for a living but I really do think that it is. Yes, there’s, there’s good to everything. Like there are good parts of social media. Many of the people I know I met through social media and there’s lots of good messages that can be spread and
good relationships that can be made. But there, there is a lot that is really, really bad. So, I think taking breaks or just being online less would probably be a good thing.
Athena
Oh, yeah, I agree. I think, I think for most people they’re not just gonna completely drop social media,
although it would be great. Like, we just lived in a world where maybe everyone that I loved was super close to me and then I would totally drop social media completely. but it’s a, it’s a tough one, I think. Yeah. As much as much as you can just find, find some hobbies do some things and reels are so addicting real tiktok.
It’s so easy for people to get people as in me and everyone else get dragged into things like that and you’re just, like, stuck watching reels and then it’s, like, 30 minutes later and you’re like, what am I doing with my life?
Athena, Dani
Like, let me get a hobby, let me do something, just getting off doing something, doing a new hobby, trying something new, like going out into the actual world occasionally, hang out with real people.
Athena
It makes such a difference in how you feel about yourself because I think, well, actually hang out with real people who make you feel good. Yeah. People who are also, you know, maybe draining your energy or talking about how much they hate themselves and everyone else, then you’re gonna be drained even more. If you hang out with people that are just, like, positive.
Not always, of course, no one could be positive all the time but mostly positive, mostly positive about themselves. That makes such a difference. Like talking to my friends who just like love themselves. I’m like, yeah, give me that energy like I don’t please give me more that. Yeah.
Dani
Agreed. It’s, I, I think back like I, I’m older than you but I think back to like before we had the c like the internet in our pockets all the time like yes, we had the internet but we didn’t have all of it in our pocket all the time and you just like went about your day like you, if you wanted to know what was going on, like on the forums or whatever or even on social media, like you had to wait till the end of your day when you were done with school or done with work and come home and deliberately
power it up and like find it and figure out like, OK, this is what happened, the fact that it’s so prevalent and like it, it becomes like a numbing agent basically for every second of discomfort in our entire lives. Oh, you’re, you’re uncomfortable for a split second.
You don’t like waiting in line at the grocery store, pull the phone out of your pocket. Yeah. And I mean, I, I don’t want to sound preachy. I’m super guilty of all of this. which is why I think I’m so passionate about it because I don’t want to be like that, you know.
Athena
Yeah. Well, I’m the same way and I’ve even seen, I’ve seen other podcasts where they talk where I forgot who it was, but they were talking about how we view our phones nowadays, like, as an extension of ourselves. Like when we hand our phone to somebody else, it feels like we’re like giving a part of ourselves to someone and it’s like, it’s, it’s so sad but it’s so true. Like, it’s uncomfortable to, like, be away from your phone or to give your phone to someone else.
people are so scared of their phones being taken, which that part, you know, they’re expensive but it’s like we have such an emotional reaction to it or feeling towards it with it and it’s, it’s pretty, it’s pretty depressing and like I said, I feel like I’m the same way. I don’t like it when people take my phone or being away from it.
Dani
I’m super curious what the research is gonna say in the next, like, 10 years or so about phone addiction because I’ve told j about, like, I was like, I’m addicted to my phone and he kind of like poo poos. The idea away. Like, how could you be addicted to your phone? But if you think about, like, what addiction actually means like that, that almost compulsion to always be doing that thing and, and I guess the number one thing being like, it interrupting your life, you know, and, and I
wouldn’t say that it, it interrupts my life, like it’s causing a rift in my relationships or anything. But how could anything, how could something that I do for hours a day not be interrupting my life? Like every time you say yes to something you’re saying no to something else. So every time you’re scrolling on your phone, you could have been doing something else, like, more meaningful than that.
Athena
Like every single day. Like I spend so much time on here, I could have went for a walk. I could have played with the cats. There’s always something better. I don’t want to say better because sometimes you do need the relaxation. But usually I shouldn’t spend that much time on the relaxation of the phone.
So, yeah, I think there’s definitely gonna be some research that comes out eventually on that. It’s all, all of, it’s impacting us in so many ways, impacting our views, impacting what we think about ourselves, impacting how we feel.
Dani
And I know there is already some research about teenagers and social media. And I mean, the data is really super clear that it is negatively impacting their mental health, all of them, but especially girls, like, it’s especially impacting girls and making them depressed and anxious, which I think makes absolute perfect sense. You know, you used to, if you wanted to, if you wanted to know what was going on in the world, you had to watch the news at a certain time or buy the newspaper
that day and it would be, you know, you can only fit so much in a newspaper, right? How can you not
be anxious? I mean, I know we’re getting away from like body image here but how can you not be anxious when you’re seeing every horrible news headline in the world inside of like 15 minutes all the time in real time?
Athena
Sometimes it’s it’s, yeah, it’s a lot. So on that topic, you write your Instagram feed.
Athena, Dani
That’s, that was exactly my next thing was like, what, like be very mindful of what you follow on any platform, Instagram, Twitter, youtube.
Athena
The all the other ones, pay it.
Dani
Pay attention to how certain stuff makes you feel because you might be following somebody because you think it’s inspirational or you think it’s motivational, but in actuality, pay attention. Is it actually making you feel better? Is it actually inspiring you to go do something or is it just making you feel like you’re less than, and you’re not good enough because if it’s, that just unfollow them, I’ve told my friends and family to unfollow me if it bothers them.
You know, if my non vegan proteins related friends and family, if they don’t wanna see my reels about fat loss, if that upsets them, just say, just unfollow me, you’re not gonna hurt my feelings at all. Like, I totally get it.
Athena
Yeah. I think it’s, like when it comes to motivational posts, those are things like those don’t usually make me feel very good when they’re like, look at me, I’m at a 4 a.m. working out. I’m like, oh, man, I don’t feel very great right now. I don’t like those kinds of posts and some people do depending on, like, everyone likes something different. I’m not a fan of that. I’m like, ok, well, good for you. Have fun.
Dani
Yeah, I think I used to be a fan of that kind of stuff because I would see it and just be like, oh, so disciplined. Like, I, I’m, I’m gonna be that disciplined. I’m gonna be in that club and, you know, I, I have been in that club actually, like, I’ve been that person but over, I mean, I didn’t post about it like that, but
over the years I’ve realized, like, that entire mindset of being 100% on all the time is awful.
Like, I don’t actually want to live like that and I don’t, I don’t know many people that do want to live like that, even the people I know that have lived like that. So I could name, I could name drop a whole bunch of my friends. And I guarantee you a lot of these listeners would know there’s so much cat hair in front of me right now. That, you know, we’ve all done that, we’ve all done the, you know, hustle, hustle, hustle, you gotta, you gotta hustle if you wanna make your dreams come true,
constantly nonstop, you gotta want it more than anything else. And like all of us are older now and all of us are like, dude, this sucks like this. Like, I like spending time with my family sometimes and occasionally I wanna go somewhere without my laptop, you know.
Hm. But sometimes I think you gotta go through that to get there, you know, because people, it’s kind of like having abs, like people think they want abs until they have abs for a while and they’re like, actually I do like cake occasionally.
Athena
So, no, there you go. II I do agree. I think it is a phase because I have been there where I love, I actually only used to listen to motivational speakers as I worked out. Like, that’s the on like I didn’t listen to music. It was only motivation and I think I grew out of that face so hard when now I’m just, I’m just like no, get out of my ear, please.
Dani
Yeah, I guess just different stuff motivates me now. Like different things inspire me seeing people that have achieved what I would consider to be balanced. Which, oh, that’s something we could talk about seeing people achieve what I perceive to be balanced. That is always like I want to learn what and, and if they’re actually sharing practical tips, that’s the important part.
If they’re sharing like how they’ve done that. I think that’s awesome but there’s a big, but I think there are a ton of influencers out there more way more of them than not that are sharing boasts or whatever, that literally frame their life as being incredibly balanced. Like they have, they have the perfect relationship and they go out with their friends and they exercise, but also they relax and look at my super colorful meal that I’m eating and, and I think in reality again,
because I do know a lot of these people, their lives are not balanced. They are that go, go, go grind, grind, grind type of person, but that’s not what they’re sharing. They’re sharing hashtag balance.
Athena
Like I’ve seen that so many times as well where I’m like, huh OK. That’s not actually as balanced as you think it is. But OK, or I hate when I see people posting like a balanced meal of what they’re eating and then people comment, you can eat that much I’m like, oh my goodness. So on top of social media
curating your feed, like, also curate the comments if you are, like, watching all these videos and reading the comments, stuff, reading them because most of the time they’re just
awful. I, it makes me sick to read that when people are, like, you’re eating too much food. I’m like, it’s normal. I would consider that like, too little food, in my opinion.
Dani
I mean, everybody’s got something to say. It’s actually one of the reasons I don’t post more about what I actually eat. Not because I don’t want to share. I’m not like ashamed of it or anything like that. I, I would be happy to share. But the fact that every time I post anything about food, anything about food, I will get comments from every direction. Oh my God, that’s so processed. And then on the other side of like you’re promoting diet culture and then there’s like, gluten is
terrible for you and people like, do you know what soy does to your body? And I’m just like, please go away like all of you just go away because there are people that I’m trying to talk to right now that I think could really benefit from seeing the way that, you know, vegan athletes actually eat and you’re all just noise like it’s just all of this noise, it’s confusing to other people. But then if you turn your comments off, you’re like, a coward. Right. So, what are you gonna do?
Athena, Dani
Yeah, it’s, it’s tough out here and I don’t wanna make it sound like people are like, deliberately being deceptive because I don’t think an influencer wakes up someday and they like twirl their mustache and go like today, I’m going to convince the world that I live a balanced life.
Dani
Like no, they may very well be wanting that, you know, they’re, they may very well be striving for that balanced life and not there yet. But you know, they happened to go to a cookout that weekend. So they’re gonna share a picture of that even though. So now you think they like go to cookouts on the weekend, but really they posted it because they never go to
cookouts on weekends and this was like a special thing for them. But from your perspective, you’re just misinterpreting it because you’re getting like 1% of the picture.
Athena
Yeah, I actually just saw the documentary. I am Bolt about Usain Bolt and then he’s an Olympic. I mean, well, you if you don’t know, no, I mean, he’s Usain Bolt. but he’s an Olympic gold medal is like times 20 and he, the documentary was really nice because it also shows him having fun going out and partying and I’m like, even Olympic athletes are out here partying like balance is so key in following people that I, I think that was like a documentary that was like very
uplifting, little motivation. But it was, yeah, it was just like, OK, like this is the kind of documentary I need to watch and curate my everything that was, yeah, it’s tough.
Dani
You know what else? I would encourage a lot of our viewers to seek out older people on the internet because everything that gets pushed in the algorithm I feel like is like, you know, young, youthful beauty, which is great. Like youth is beautiful, we get it. But I think that especially women, you know, we’re told men age like fine wine, they get better as they age and women just turn into like dried up, shriveled raisins and we disappear.
And it’s not true like I deliberately started trying to follow women o over 50 I’m not 50 I’m not 40 but I started following women over 50 because I feel like the message that we get as we get older and you’ll, you’ll see this when you get older. Fucking bleak. Like it’s just bleak how much you are treated like you’re becoming invisible after you, you know, turn a certain age and it can feel kind of like is this, it was that it did I
peak like was was that it like, oh my God. So finding older women or if you’re a guy, finding older men to follow that are like living their best lives is really inspiring to me.
Athena
I agree and watching people do things that are, or like following people that are doing things that are fun, like that live an average but fun life that is like, so not just camera pictures of the mirror at the gym. It’s like, oh, you’re actually enjoying your life, you’re staying physically active and you’re just living it up, you’re traveling, you’re
doing things, you’re being with friends. I love it. I think I like, I like to follow. Yeah. Older people is a good one. I think that’s a, actually I think that’s a great example.
Athena, Dani
I don’t, I don’t know that I’ve even, I’ll send you some, I’ll send you some like bad ass older women that just give you like, yeah.
Dani
No, we got a lot of life left in us actually, even in our fifties.
Athena
So you have to see in the show notes we can put like a group of accounts to follow or like, I guess you
could do that. People that I really enjoy. I did write them down actually. But I don’t know if anyone would actually remember it from me saying the name. So maybe we could put it in the notes, we can put them in the notes that make me feel so good. Like there’s women and men that do videos where they show like themselves looking amazing and then they show themselves in a completely
different pose but the same exact like second just like show like their hair and showing their pores and showing their arm hair and their like fat sticking out and then the photos like them looking perfect. So it’s just like, it’s really nice to see those kind of photos because I’m like, oh yeah, reminder it’s all.
Dani
Yes and ok, so here I guess this is sort of like my last tip. If you have other tips, I’d love to hear them, but this will be the last one I think I have like, not just curate what you follow, but I would say like pay attention to the content you put out as well. Like I know we all want to always put our best face forward, our best selves forward. But I have actually found that I have built way more connections with people online by sharing the other stuff, the stuff, I mean, I posted a reel
yesterday about crotch sweat at the gym and it got more engage than anything I’ve posted in the last month that could actually change someone’s life. So I was like, that’s it. I just need to post absolutely ridiculous stuff apparently if I want anybody to see anything I do. But, you know, sharing, sharing ST I share lots of stories where I’m not wearing any makeup at all.
or sharing stories were like my house is messy or I didn’t get to the gym today and I hadn’t intended to get to the gym and, you know, when the kids were around, I shared a lots of struggles that I had through that. So I think that, you know, as much as we want the stuff we’re looking at to be more real. I think that also means that we should show up a little more real.
Athena, Dani
Also, I agree with that.
Athena
I have one last thing that I would say, I think to build confidence offline in ways of like I know or me and Alex, you know, Alex, for everyone else, she’s just my friend and we both were just going back and forth telling each other things we like about each other or like love about each other. I love that and we said that it can’t be aesthetic just like what, what are the things that like I love about you?
Non aesthetically, like your good heart, you like the way you listen, like all those like things like that. I think that like just finding a friend or a husband partner, whatever to do things like that with like to talk about things that are just not aesthetic, talk about ways to build confidence, find a group of friends or encourage a group of friends to kind of maybe comment less about things like that and remind them of things that are more important. Building building
confidence offline, I think is is really, really helpful for me, especially like my mom, she’s great at it. She’s like, like if I feel insecure about a guy she’s like, ok, they’re a guy, like, they’re like, like, if you’re a good person, like, they’re gonna like you. Ok. I believe you. It’s like, true. But I’ll believe her just like people that build you up. I think it’s just so important and focusing more on that than online. So, I think it’s really, really helpful. Yeah.
Dani
Just stop being so chronically online from step one. But then, yeah, building a community around you in reality, which I don’t know if anybody’s gonna be able to see this Alex, but she is in fact on my fridge right now, that’s their, that’s their save the date. so, yeah, I think that’s awesome that you guys do that. I don’t think I’ve ever done that, like, specifically, so specifically with anybody before.
but I think it is actually a really good idea and I know that whenever I’m talking to Daisy, so that, that’s, I guess, I guess that could kind of be another tip about like, what you’re following or what you’re posting? Like, would you want your daughter to see that? Like, because is it gonna change the way she thinks about things? So, when I’m talking to Daisy, I’m always really careful about the compliments that I give.
Like, certainly she puts on a dress and sparkles and stuff and I’m like, you look so beautiful. But, you know, I’m also giving her lots of other compliments about how, like she never gives up and she’s so funny and all of these other things too because I often find that little boys get those kinds of compliments. You’re so fast, you’re so strong. and girls get that you’re so pretty and not a whole lot else beyond that.
Athena
So that’s something I’ve actually been working on too because I saw a video recently of like what they actually deleted a lot of it, but there was a video of what it means like if you Google Manly and then you Google Womanly, but the manly it said a bunch of nice things like I said like you’re strong, you’re I don’t know things like that like all those very, very like kind things to men like strong and masculine and protective.
Dani
And I I saw this one and then the girl says, mom, what does it say about me? That one? Yeah.
Athena
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then it says, yeah, what does it say about being a girl or womanly or something like that?
Dani
And it was just like weak docile pleasant, like all of these just like kind of weak ass thing. Yeah.
Athena
And they just said it but then Google like Google deleted a bunch of the descriptions. So they’re not there anymore, which is sad that it was there in the first place.
Dani
But I mean, good for the whoever it was who made that real. That’s amazing. That’s like an example of something actually making like positive change immediately. Which is pretty cool.
Athena
Yes, I agree because, yeah, now, I think, doesn’t, it only has a couple of examples now?
Dani
Wow, that’s fascinating. So, all right guys, if you’re listening to this, first of all, I always like to hear the listeners or viewers feedback about all of these things. If you’re watching it on youtube, leave a comment. Like, what do you do? How do you deal with this? How do you reckon with these sorts of things in your brain? If you’re listening, just shoot us an email, poach it vegan protein and give us your feedback about this sort of thing.
Of course. Also, if you are looking for any kind of coaching to build muscle, lose fat, get stronger, any of those things and you’re a vegan hit us up, that’s exactly what we do. And as you can tell by these kinds of topics, we place a large emphasis on someone’s mental health and their perspective and making sure that that all stays in check along the way. So check that out Vegan proteins.com.
I think that’s it. I’m gonna wrap it up. All right. All right, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of Vegan Proteins Muffled By Brussels Radio. As always, you can find us on Facebook, Instagram, youtube. And if you’re looking for coaching Vegan proteins.com. Once again, my name is Dani. I’m Athena and we’ll talk to you soon. Bye holes.